Laura has wanted Netflix for, oh, all of her life: All my friends have it. You could save a lot of money over cable. I’ll never ask you for anything else (I remember that ploy when her and Emily’s ears were double pierced!). You could see what you wanted (a great improvement over Hall Mark channel, I suppose, which is the only decent remnant in all the cable TV “upgrades.”)
I do not give a rat’s backside about the content of our television. I have not turned it on or watched since the day after the last presidential election. I have an unfinished sweater by my empty chair, proving I have not even watched HGTV in the intervening months.
But, Laura wants Netflix. I ask friends. “Oh, you just need a streaming device. Laura can do it.” I listen to rapturous recitations of this streaming device and watching Netflix on my phone, my tablet, my computer. “You need internet, too.” Check. “Laura can do it.”
Since Laura wants it and can do it, I put her in charge. “Find out how to get Netflix. Ask your friends. Ask you siblings. Ask your cousin. Ask google.”
After a decent interval, I asked for a Netflix report. “I don’t understand what anyone is saying.”
After another interval, I did it my way. I called Netflix. I told Brie I was building from the ground up, information-wise. How did I obtain Netflix for my granddaughter? “Oh, she can do it….”
Just tell me.
You need to create an account. “As in a way to pay you?” Yes. Check.
You need a smart TV. “How do I know if I have a smart TV?” Does it have an HDMI input? “I see HDMI on the screen; I can look around and see if there is an HDMI plug in.”
Then you need a streaming device. This is the point at which I consider screaming whenever I engage in the Netflix conversation. “Yes, I’ve been told. What is a streaming device?”
Oh, a Roku, a Firestick, a Chrome….
“A thing! Where do I get a Roku, a Firestick?”
Best Buy, Target. Like that.
I thanked Brie. I hung up. I uttered my standby obscenity, which may show up in comments. I fired up Amazon and bought a Roku, for delivery today. I’m pretty good at setting up accounts, that sort of stuff.