Friday, November 20, 2020

How pleas the defendant?

 Back in the beginning of time, when I had two brothers, my youngest brother was a tad wild and crazy. Before he was married he had an on and off roommate whose temperament matched his own. This young man also had a wild name that I believe he was assigned at birth, though his friends may have bestowed it at some time.

At this very moment I cannot recall the roommate's name, so I put in a call to my sister, who is eleven years more cognizant than I. If she calls me back before I post, we'll know the other young man's name.


I went into the studio one day this week, and saw the shambles on the shelf of towels, and thought of my brother and the trials of the poor dog he and his roomie lived with. My roomie being a cat, a trial could never occur.

But their poor dog would be called to  view the undisturbed evidence and asked if he pleaded guilty to eating the rug, desecrating the trash, knocking down the lamp, eating the bowl of popcorn and so forth and so on.

Being a dog, this fellow would sit with a silly grin on his face and listen to the evidence presented. At the end, the dog was allowed to plead "Not Guilty!" And my brother and his roomie would look at each other and one at a time, each would announce "Guilty!"

And the poor dog lost, two to one.

I'll bet a few of you fellows have put your dog on trial, for want of excitement after a boring day at work. Fess up. Did the dog ever win?

 

35 comments:

  1. I have never put any of my dogs on trial....they deserve better than the mouse in Alice in Wonderland when the cur - Fury - announces 'I'll be judge, I'll be jury said cunning old Fury, I'll try the whole cause and condemn you to death.'
    They run amok at times....but no harm done.

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  2. I don't know, but I do know that cats never lose.

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  3. Jazz is certainly guilty. Often. And cares not a jot.
    Growing up the dog was often blamed (unfairly) for some of our sins...

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  4. I've put my cat on trial several times for various "crimes" but even though she is obviously guilty, she never feels that she is or takes responsibility. Quite narcissistic.

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  5. I do, all the time! Have to, there are 4 of them and the cat. They can't all be guilty. I do admit I have accused the wrong one and had to apologize. They all have a "tell".

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  6. Oh yes, the afternoon we came home to find a pound of butter, a loaf of bread and a pan of date squares missing. A chewed up can proved who was the guilty party, and it wasn't either one of the cats!

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  7. My all-time favorite 'guilty dog' video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rlU1yKHL3c0

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  8. our dog did occasionally win, when he was a puppy, but when older, he would be shown the wrongdoing then put outside for a while to be on his own. He would look at us through the glass doors with such sad eyes and we would pretend to not see him for at least a half hour, then all was forgiven.

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  9. Roxy always wins, but then she is perfect.....just ask her.

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  10. Dog is smarter than the humans here so dog always wins :) Don't you hate when you can't remember a name?? It'll come to you at the most inopportune time I think.

    betty

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  11. I love some of those videos where people call the dog in to view the mess and the dog has part of the disaster (like a broken trash can lid) stuck around his neck. Many dogs do show guilt but a cat - never! I tried to show my cat the roll of toilet paper he had unrolled and he simply gave me a totally disgusted look as if to say "Why in the world did YOU do that?" You are right Joanne, with a cat a trial can never happen, unless of course the cat is putting you on trial!

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  12. I never did that to any of my dogs. All I had to do was point at the offence and say very gently, now I wonder who did that? And the corresponding guilt, evidenced by tail down and a face turned into a corner was enough to convince me of the crime and resist hugging them for downright cuteness.

    Great inventory on your shelves.

    XO
    WWW

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  13. Animals don't take notice of what I say, they live in their own world, where the act might justify the guilt they feel.

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  14. Having never had a dog I wouldn't know, but our two cats caused havoc and appeared to get away with it. :D

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  15. Hari OM
    LOl - oh no... my Angel Jade was indeed an angel when it came to not destroying stuff. There was that one occasion, however, of the demolished bbq chook I'd brought home to feed friends coming for dinner. That, apparently, had nothing whatsoever to do with angel Jasper cat who sat up on the counter looking very pointedly at his sisfur... who looked first at Jasper then at me then at Jasper then at me and Jasper never once blinked... the chook flew all by itself from the counter to the floor... yes, yer honour... YAM xx

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  16. I have two suspects who go on trial on a regular basis. However, it's always the dachshund that is the guilty party. Unless the mischief has occurred on the kitchen counter. Then Lovey is the obvious culprit.

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  17. It is traditional to blame the dog for a fart. This is the only reason British people keep dogs. In my house, if food goes missing I blame a particular rat. H.I. thinks it looks like me.

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  18. Never having had a dog I have eschewed the pleasure of the trial!

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  19. We are still trying to be the persons our dog thinks we are. Anyway, our poor dog has had a trial and tribulation all her own since September, when she began losing the fur on her tail and hindquarters. Such a pretty dog should not have a tail that looks like it belongs to a rat. Turns out she is low on thyroid. She began a lifetime of daily thyroid pills yesterday. All she wants for Christmas is a furry tail.

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  20. There is no creature on earth whose guilt plays out on their faces as surely as a dog's.

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  21. This is the first year in my life that I do not have a dog. I remember how they betray themselves long before we find out what they really did.

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  22. The times I've fussed at my dogs, they just looked pitiful and sad and were forgiven immediately. Note - this is not true with the Demon Duo who just completely ignore me and walk away.

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  23. "did you do that?" guilty dog hangs her head. she's a good dog though and rarely gets into mischief. but then one has to understand the nature of dogs and plan accordingly. my son-in-law, who would not secure trash or food or whatever, would always get angry with their dog, whichever one it was, for being a dog. not the dog's fault in my opinion, for acting like a dog.

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  24. Goodness - if that shelf is what you call a shambles then I'm glad you are unlikely ever to see any of my shelves.

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  25. Oh yeah, our dogs always have shown guilt. Funniest video I saw about dogs being castigated for making a mess was of two Yellow Labradors sitting side by side with their heads down. After finally being asked, point-blank, who did it, one Lab quickly put his paw on the top of the other one as if to assign blame. The other Lab turned and gave him a wide-eyed stare as if to say, WTF, you're outing me?

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  26. Did they all end up as lawyers, dog included?

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  27. My daughter's Great Dane is constantly getting into trouble... usually for eating something left within his reach... and often obviously guilty. When my mom lived with us she often accused the cat of things (once it was taking her purse).

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  28. The dog doesn't have a chance in a kangaroo court.

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  29. My ex-mother-in-law gave my daughters a puppy one day without asking any of us if we wanted it. It turned out that its preferred diet consisted of socks and Cindy doll outfits... the girls didn't mind the socks so much but when it ate Cindy's tutu, it had to go.

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  30. I regularly tell my dog, "It is a good thing you are cute, otherwise you'd be in trouble all the time". Spoiled rotten!

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  31. My cat judges me a lot. If she could mete out punishment, the only thing that would save me is my opposable thumbs. She cannot open her own cat food.

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  32. How true about cats and dogs. The dog would look guilty and you know how innocent a cat will appear! I am curious about that name you mentioned!

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  33. Dog, cat, bird, and even the raccoons are always innocent. My Retired Man, though, always looks guilty.

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