Friday, April 14, 2023

Current state of affairs

First, me. I believe I am relying too much on my sister to take care of me. She took me to a doctor appointment this week that took a whole afternoon. I didn't drive because I was told the Check Engine light was on, and that discourages me. 

I've pretty much decided to quit driving and start using either Uber, or a local service. The first opportunity is a month away, and I'll postpone judgement until then. I've turned selling the car over to Beth. It's a Subaru, which she dotes on. I find I should have left well enough alone and kept the old Dodge, that I understood. The Subi is too complicated for me, and I think I'm a danger on the road trying to figure it out.

Tom drove it home from the doctor to my apartment, and in his very typical manner, nothing was returned to its original configuration.  So, now I have learned how to send the front driver's seat forward and back, up and down. Best learned in the parking lot, stationary, as I was this morning, thinking I needed to get to the dealer to turn off the Check Engine light. Which was not glowing this morning. I know how to leave well enough alone. I'll simply turn the paperwork over to Beth and walk away.

I'm working at getting stronger every day. The two weeks I was laid up took some stuffing out of me. It's no use being unhappy with the current state of affairs being unnecessarily inflicted on me. No matter how I wound up with a perforated lung, now I must get over it; get stronger and better. 

The only "excitement" in my life is my cat, who does little to acknowledge me.


She does have a routine established. I am the source of treats, and she now asks for treats, as in the picture. She stares at me until I pass out at few. She never puts herself in danger of being caught. Remember, I am very limited, physically. She darts away from any touch or contact. So, I am in my desk chair and Kitty is requesting treats.

Kitty does sleep under the feather comforter as much as possible. During the day, when I am not here, she hops on the bed and slithers between the comforter and sheet. At night, when I am in bed, she enters from the foot of the bed and stops before my knee. So, I am at a loss what to do to enhance this relationship. I do need to move "treats" to a bigger chair. Sounds like a plan for this weekend.

And my weekend excitement includes going with Beth for a pedicure. My first ever! Woo-hoo. And, a new decoration for my door:



34 comments:

  1. I'm starting to wonder about driving too, I'm ok with trips around town, uncertain about longer trips, like up to Seattle. I hope you're not having issues with the pneumothorax you had, be aware of sudden shortness of breath.
    Take care,
    Mike

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tx, Mike. That was a long time ago, but doesn't mean it can't reoccur. I'm on an inhaler, with a good pulmonary fellow, Dr. Mohammed. It's the little Stioloto inhaler, two puffs in the morning.

      Delete
  2. My mother knew when it was time for her to stop driving too. Not an easy decision but a good one. I hope I will know when to do it too. Getting your strength back will be a slow process but I hope you will see the progress, Joanne.

    ReplyDelete
  3. You've had a couple of challenging weeks. Given this, I'd step back, rest as much as possible and make no final decisions until you've recovered fully. Regarding your health, if you have any doubts, get a second opinion. Also, get a full physical, checking all blood levels including IGG. Address anything that is out of line. Today, you have to formally ask for testing; nothing happens automatically. Enjoy your pedicure. Kitty is treat motivated. I wonder if she would sit on your lap for a treat? Take care Joanne.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm glad you're giving yourself time to consider driving or the options. And your kitty will do what she wants when she wants! That's the tortie code.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I never knew how Torties were. They're independent little cusses. Here's hoping for the regaining of strength and stamina. Time off one's feet is never good.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hugs. Regaining strength is always sooooo much slower than it was to lose it. Which seems to me to be totally unfair.
    Our small tabbie has finally decided he loves us (just over six months after he arrived).

    ReplyDelete
  7. I'm not sure Kitty will ever be a snuggly sort. Some cats are like that. She has come a long way though. Being willing to share the bed is a huge feat.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Enjoy the pedicure! Yes, some cats are just standoffish. HRH was like that too.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Hari OM
    Just as you contemplate retiring from behind the wheel, I am about to take up driving again... on Thursday I test-drove the van of my dreams and subsequently have one on order. Hopefully handover on my birthday! Now, c'mon Kitty cat, show Joanne some lluuurrrvvvvvvvvvv....puuurrrsssss... YAM xx

    ReplyDelete
  10. Joanne, I stopped driving when I no longer felt comfortable... you will know if and when that happens. As for the kitty, it may take time... and again, she may never be a lap sitting cat. You will have to wait and see. But, she seems to be adapting well. Keep talking to her.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I'm surprised that your community doesn't offer a shuttle service.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Kitty has remarkable markings, very pretty. Is it possible the engine light is on because the gas cap is not put in place securely enough? A family member went to the dealer for that problem, they eventually figured out that was the problem, they just tightened the gas cap.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I love your decoration, Joanne! And admire how you work hard to get better - you have stamina (in the little book "Live alone and like it" written in the Thirties, Marjory Hills calls that "to have spunk" and "not being a weak sister" - you definitely are tough!)
    That cat is a mystery to me - a challenge, I would say. Distracts you.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I gave up my car as my sight was beginning to play up. It is a bit of a shock but Uber cars and shared cars are one of the answers. Do take care Joanne.

    ReplyDelete
  15. There comes a time when prudent people know that it's time to stop driving and I think you have reached that point, Joanne. Kudos to you. As for the cat, only time may change things, I suppose. They do have a mind of their own.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Leo gave up driving when his paralysed feet no longer made contact with the pedals. We have a driver, but I miss the opportunity to stop at something that interests me...the time to give the order means that we have passed whatever it is.

    ReplyDelete
  17. My attitude is this- if it's stressing you out to drive and deal with a car, then don't do it. Uber is a fine substitute.
    I love your new door decoration. It is lovely.

    ReplyDelete
  18. my cat before Cat considered affection to be being in the same room with me. never a cuddler or lap sitter, at best she would lay on the footrest next to my feet when I was in the recliner. torties though are supposed to be in general very affectionate in nature. Cat certainly is. slow progress but I wouldn't give up hope. a wise woman knows when to stop driving and you are wise. uber certainly makes it easier to give up the car.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Sounds as though Kitty has now thoroughly weighed you up and is thinking - as you are - one step at a time. Good luck.

    ReplyDelete
  20. We lose our strength and fitness very quickly when laid up, and it's hard work getting it back.

    ReplyDelete
  21. It took Mari a long time to warm up to me. It's good that you're letting her call the shots. I love mani-pedis, especially the massage! But if you have ticklish feet, watch out. :)

    ReplyDelete
  22. Pirate was at first uncomfortable at being promoted to navigator ( and emergency relief driver) from driver...but now is doing a good job of observing countryside that he hasn't been able to see as a driver...and learning how to describe things to me!!
    Kit will take her time..but you both have made good progress.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Your cat must have had some really unfortunate experiences.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Just today our new cat (7 weeks with us) sat on the sofa when I was already there. Before now she'd lie on the floor and I'd have to bend over to scratch or brush her. It's a trust issue, and we're taking it at her pace.

    ReplyDelete
  25. I have never driven a car so letting go isn't an issue for me. The day I'm unable to climb into a bus will be something to worry about, hopefully that's light years away.

    ReplyDelete
  26. I don't think you should be discouraged with your Kitty. I really think that she's doing quite well. It was a big move for her, and one of many, I imagine. And then you up and disappear for a while as she is trying to get it all straight.

    Houdini is quite a lovey at this point. His new favorite thing is being brushed. He does love that. You are sure and steady. Kitty will come around when she's ready to.

    ReplyDelete
  27. That kitty is a stinker and is goig to make you work for her affection! I am starting to wonderif I should take over all the driving here. HeWho used to tow was always a very good driver, but lately he tends to his those rumble bumps on the road way too much and he smashed his tail light just last week while trying to back the trailer in place. Golden years? Not so much!

    ReplyDelete
  28. It takes courage to give up the independence that an automobile affords, but based upon what you said, you made the correct choice. Good for you. Be patient with kitty, cats bond with their humans at their own pace, you are doing all the right things, she'll come around when she's ready.

    ReplyDelete
  29. So glad you're back in your own space. It sounds as though healing and cat wrangling will keep you busy for a while.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Getting rid of the car will be a relief, no doubt. Still, it will take some getting used to. I wish you the absolute best!

    ReplyDelete
  31. I stopped driving about 8 years ago. Migraines made it unsafe for me to drive. Fortunately, husband retired once we moved to be near our daughter. I have an Uber account which I must start using.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Glad you're moved back...and kitty will come around!
    hugs
    Donna

    ReplyDelete
  33. I am sorry to hear that you are letting the car go and it takes a wise person to recognize their limitations. There are still way too many people out there who retire from driving. Take care and keep getting stronger.

    ReplyDelete