I'm wrapped in such a sense of anxiety. Time cannot pass quickly enough. It's like the last days before the baby is born. I remember that feeling, rising through my body. It was there before my divorce was final, before my mother died.
Watching this year's events unfold, that sense has started up in me often, and I've sent it away. Literally tell myself "Stop this. Get on with something else!"
The last few mornings, I've read the news summaries in my night gown. The first morning was to assure myself the President still was alive.
My home town paper scrabbles along, and I subscribe on line. A while back I cut back to one big city paper and chose the Washington Post. I don't know why I picked it over the New York paper, and all that matters is my attempt to keep abreast.
That home town paper is Akron Beacon Journal, known affectionately is the Reekin' Journal. The front page story today is early voting, written in their sad, human interest style. The line is a two hour wait. One of those public interest groups spawned in my kind of home town advises the elderly and infirm to bring meds and water and juice.
The rest of the story, on an inside page, drops my explosive. Instead of the usual 150 booths, there are 50. The cause is the pandemic.
I won't go into any of my solutions. There is one. There are many. It's too late, and no longer the point.
I wonder if we will remember the entire list that must be restored.
This is not a third world country. It is one of the longest surviving and improving democracies on the planet. There have been setbacks, we've lurched forward. The latest setback is the whole of the anxiety, the foreboding.
The questions are the answer. How many poor people does it take to make one rich person?
I don't know. I'm going to weave now.
I love that beautiful circular picture at the bottom of your post Joanne. Have you made it? As to your politics - I know nothing of them. Our own are in enough turmoil - don't think I can cope with someone else's too.
ReplyDeleteweaving soothes the mind, organizes one row after the next- I am so glad that you have that to keep you sane and less traumatized by the incredible events - Of which we have no control- we can vote, wear masks, stay away from humans- weave! Draw, felt, bake, cruise nurseries. We will come out of this...
ReplyDeleteI feel exactly as you do Joanne, my fuse is getting shorter by the day. Weave puts it so well, we lurch from one cock-up to the next here, unlike her though I do get het up about the clown that is Trump. The cheek of the man.
ReplyDeleteLX
Let's hope the nightmare is over soon.
ReplyDeleteIt is fun reading the side of things when there is another side who were once equally unhappy.
ReplyDeleteNo it's not funny. It's heartbreaking. Every four years intelligent people engage in this destructive behaviour for months at a time when all this effort could go into something else.
DeleteSo true Margaret.
DeleteYes, I think that inner turmoil reflects the total chaos of our poor country. But we will get it back.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry. We are all so very anxious in Canada too with so many dear ones wading through this morass of insanity every hour every day. I do post a bunch on my Covid Site mainly as to what not to do in this appalling, relentless pandemic. Have heart, the polls tell a good story today though the stocks are teetering downwards and I have the feeling the man is so drugged up he must be seriously ill, his tweets are the madness of a naked emperor.
ReplyDeleteXO
WWW
we need only to look at the list of Trump's EOs for a good start on what to repair. the whole country is weary, well, those that aren't angry. what was once sort of entertaining is now just boring. still? still this? I think Trump is toast. it's the rest of the republican party that worries me. in their attempt to remain in power they will do every underhanded thing they can think of.
ReplyDeleteI think it's faulty thinking we'll be back to what was 'normal' a year ago will be back anytime in our lifetimes, maybe our children's. I think a year from now we'll still be wearing masks, that over half a million US citizens will have died, I think we'll be shunned by the other countries, and will need visa's to get into the few that will let us in.
ReplyDeleteI also think there is a very strong possibility that the 'United'States of America will be no longer. It's run it's course, we are so divided that we don't even want to talk to those on the other side of the line.
We are also still taken by the myth that there were 'good old days'...unless your white with a good skill, oh, and also male.
Just my point of view, cheers.
It seems that all we can do is wait. I'm glad you have your weaving to help keep your sanity. I'm going to sew today. I've called the Gastro and left a message. We shall see...
ReplyDeleteBeautiful weaving.
ReplyDeleteIt feels like we're ages away from what was normal.
Hugs.
ReplyDeleteAnd how I adore that final image. Skilful, inspired and very, very beautiful.
The tree of life is appropriate. It seems they are making voting as difficult as possible. Do they realize their supporters will have as difficult a time? I received my ballot in the mail today. I will hand deliver it to the county auditor the day after tomorrow when I go to town.
ReplyDeleteYou have beautifully expressed how so many of us feel. Will we ever find our way back, much less forward? I do not know.
ReplyDeleteThings are pretty crazy in the States at the moment. Well actually in the UK too. Boris Johnson is often called the British Trump. God help us too!
ReplyDeleteA huge, ignorant bull has galloped through the china shop, and the rest of us must take up brooms and clean up the heaps of broken glass.
ReplyDeleteHari OM
ReplyDeleteI understand that sense of foreboding, Joanne; am experiencing it this week for entirely more intimate and immediate purpose. But probably informed by the wider picture which is every bit as dismal this side as it is yours. You weave away my friend, and I shall crochet... YAM xx
Don't have any answers, Joanne. The only thing that fits is that 'we are all in this together' (both sides) and no one is coming out the winner the way this is heading. Wish someone or something could convince everyone that we're all Americans and should be able to work this out without so much division. This Pandemic should make us all 'pull together' for everyone's good...
ReplyDeleteSuch tragedy and turmoil this administration has brought upon the country. With the aid of Fox News, it seems. I pray that people will regain their critical thinking and sense of ethics and morality. I pray that it can be restored, our poor United States of America which I love with all my heart. Their are conservatives who believe liberals do not love this country. But I am convinced that it is the conservatives who do not. Still, I try not to pay too much attention to politics. I will cultivate my garden. You will weave. I love your last image, btw.
ReplyDeleteCosta Rica is in chaos...first the bug and now huge social unrest at the President's proposals to hike up the taxes to pay off an IMF loan...people have just had enough.
ReplyDeleteWill it ever go back to the tolerant, co operative society it was? I doubt it.
It still feels unreal.
ReplyDeleteExasperation at not making voting a simple process? Just take more room to have 150 booths?
Beautiful Tree of Life
Feels like we are waiting for "the other shoe" to drop. I hope the shoe is not a jackboot. I go days without listening to or reading the news. Easier on my stress levels.
ReplyDeleteI sure understand your sense of anxiety. Why wait for a pandemic of all times to make it so difficult for everyone to vote!
ReplyDeleteI forgot to tell you - I absolutely love that tree! Did you make it?
DeleteLongest surviving I can agree with, improving - not so much,
ReplyDeleteDear Joanne, the tree you wove within a circle is lovely. And symbolic too. As to the anxiety you are feeling, I discovered it within myself the Sunday after the death of Justice Ginsburg. After reading a New York Times (digital) opinion piece on her death, I let myself simply be quiet inside to go down, down, down and discover what I was feeling. Anxiety-yes. Anger-year. Then I went farther down and there was a deep sadness that shadowed my very being.
ReplyDeleteSo I gave up politics for the next 7 weeks--until the election and maybe beyond that. I'm into, I think, my fourth week now. No reading of the newspaper. No watching national news or the PBS Newshour. No talking with others about politics. This may be the ostrich in the sand syndrome, which I've avoided for 50 years, but it's really helping me with my Meniere's, which is exacerbated by stress. It's being a good decision for me.
Take care. Your hope at the end of your posting is mine too. I think Dr. King said--and John Lewis--reiterated many times--that the arc of history moves slowly but it always bends toward justice. (At least that's how I remember it.) And so I trust that all shall--ultimately--be well so long as each of us do what we can to serve others. Peace.
I heard an answer to that question today. I am told that 25 of the richest people in the world have the combined wealth of over half of the world's population.
ReplyDeleteI just hope everyone can get in and out safely without waiting too long at the queues. I was following along with your election when all of a sudden our premier called a provincial election (somewhat like your state elections) and very important to issues like education, health care, drivers laws and so on. Right now he is in a minority government and wants a decisive victory to better lead. Within a few days over half a million people had registered to vote by mail in ballot. I'm one of them. I received my ballot within a few days and I've already mailed it. I know there are mail in issues where you live.
ReplyDeleteI turned the news off months ago. I started following like minded individuals. I started turning those off recently. I feel a lot better.
ReplyDeleteWeaving is always a good thing to do I think!
betty
The voting procedure is scary. It's too easily meddled with.
ReplyDeleteWhen the rich man becomes a poor man, he will be moved and not before.
ReplyDeleteThat is a really lovely dream catcher, did you make it?
I give you a big hug. Feel with you. Weaving might steady the nerves - symbol of time, of "This too will pass".
ReplyDeleteWe Brits are pretty anxious about the election outcome as well. Somehow or other Trump is going to try and rig it.
ReplyDeleteEveryone said what needs to be said Joanne.
ReplyDeleteI have a lot of anxiety too, and am trying to keep on top of things (mostly) while restricting my access to TOO much that will raise my blood pressure. I have a sick feeling in my stomach most of the time.
ReplyDeleteI am watching the US situation from eastern Canada with fear a trepidation. I can only imagine how it feels from there. Keep weaving, Joanne.
ReplyDeleteI'm in the same place you are. We were able to vote today.
ReplyDeleteI hope that it can be restored after 4 years of sliding down the tube.
ReplyDelete