Between not being permitted to go to work when I could work,
then being criticized and more by the troublesome trustee, my six week backlog
is not dented enough. The work is caught up, the mistakes are not. My counselor
listened sympathetically, and said she would advocate for me. She called the
trustee, explained traumatic brain injury, and for her trouble got an earful
that included, if I wanted to resign, give two weeks’ notice.
That was a red flag I could deal with. I immediately wrote
and signed my letter of resignation, effective that very day, and circulated
it. I mentioned I would be in and out the remainder of the month, doing what I
could. I’m down to sleeping only an extra four or six hours a day, and that’s
been helpful. The stack of mistakes remain, and I think before June 1st,
the mistaker will call the mistakees and outline the plan of remediation for
someone else to do.
But, the worst thing of all—I don’t amuse myself anymore,
and I probably bore all of you to tears, too. I haven’t found a bit of amusement
in the setbacks. All the people who understand what they want to understand and
not a thing more no longer make me say “Fool. Idiot!”. I don’t want to wait
another year.
The good news is, we haven’t settled the blood pressure
problem yet. I bought a new cuff. It’s little and cute. I haven’t had a blood
pressure problem for so long, I couldn’t recall the difference between a decent
reading and an indecent one. I took in the week’s list today, and my doctor
said, “These are not good.” They were all one sixty somethings over eighty somethings,
and I wasn’t fussed. She was, though.
Years ago, before I had the stroke, she and I had a blood
pressure fight. Every drug she tried made me sick, one way or another. Another
week and another week, I’m sitting on the table and she’s writing a new scrip. “This
is like throwing spaghetti on the wall,” I snarled. “How many left before you
get one to stick?” “You’re being referred to a cardiologist,” she replied, and
so I have a good one of them, too.
Unfortunately, we could not remember the name of the drug he
prescribed. I called the cardiologist’s office to check their records. Diovan,
the receptionist announced a few minutes later. Diovan! How could we forget? It
brought down blood pressure for six months before the stroke (not related),
then we damn near killed me with no blood pressure at all.
The road guys would find me passed out at the desk and call
the ambulance. I can’t tell you how many youngsters learned to insert an IV needle
because of me. My favorite one whipped the monitor around to face him when I
happened to glance over. Must have been a really low pressure reading. I looked at the
other two medics watching him, and I told the kid he just passed Bedside Manor
on his exam. That youngster now is First Lieutenant for the Memphis Fire and
Rescue.
I have refrained from commenting on your blog Ms Joanne because I don't like to use vulgar profanity on another person's blog. It is rude. I get mad enough to have a stroke when I read about how the medical people behave and how coworkers look for an excuse to be worse than usual. I picture late nights with me wearing a ski mask, carrying a can of gasoline and well you get the idea.....I hope you get to feeling better real soon and tell all those hateful people to smooch your butt! sorry I had too!
ReplyDeleteOh my, and to think I had fun adventures with my blood pressure. Stay strong, I've said before that living well is the best revenge.
ReplyDeleteI have adventures with blood pressure too. Perseverance is the key to getting the right meds as you know. Take care, Joanne.
ReplyDeleteWe care about you so keep writing. You need not entertain us, just keep us informed. My blood pressure has recently done a weird thing--over 100 on the bottom. The dr is looking into it with some blood work and I'm sure I'll have to return to her office. You keep fighting the good fight, and tell us all about it.
ReplyDeleteYou are a long way from boring us.
ReplyDeleteConsider me hissing and spitting on your behalf from ths side of the world. And my spit is toxic.
Hugs.
Its a shame you had to resign and they wouldn't give you time to try to make more of a recovery. Blood pressure is one of those things they want within their acceptable ranges, your numbers listed definitely were not.
ReplyDeletebetty
I don't know which is more frustrating, fighting for your health or fighting for respect. Often the fights come together, which is even harder.
ReplyDeleteAs I often do, I'm wishing the miles between blogging friends were not so vast. I hope you have nearby friends there who are giving you a hand with the everyday things that must get done.
I hope you are soon at the stage where you begin to see the humour - however black - in your life. Until then, just be you, whatever that is at the moment. Big hug for you.
I'm rather glad to hear you've resigned, that will be one less stress for you to handle. It's time someone else learned to figure all that out anyway. I'm sure you'll find other, happier, things to occupy that time slot.
ReplyDeleteI've never understood blood pressure and why some people have too high or too low. Mine is so normal it's boring, but I'm thankful it's something I don't need to worry about.
I do hope yours gets sorted satisfactorily very soon.
Oh my gosh, Joanne... I'm so sorry for all you're going through. We are all your cyber friends and want to keep hearing from you and knowing how you're doing.
ReplyDeleteHari OM
ReplyDeleteLike Jenny-o, many times in the past few weeks I have found myself cussing the pond between us. Especially as I can picture exactly where you are and can 'feel' you. Having just dealt with a 'troublesome' one (successfully, this side), I know the inner cost; it certainly won't have helped that BP reading. Would it now be wise to wait a few weeks now your retirement is on its way, to see that it doesn't settle of its own accord? (That's me thinking aloud again...)
...and for heaven's sake Joanne, there's not a snowball's chance you could ever bore us!!! Huggies, YAM xx
It is good that you resigned. Your BP and recovery from your accident wouldn't be helped by a callous and unsympathetic trustee. Karma will come his way.
ReplyDeleteWe all look forward to your posts, Joanne. You never bore us, Joanne; you inspire us.
Good for you for resigning, you need to concentrate on doing better with your health. My BP went down to 93/61 and it was on a thursday, I called the office, not in till next Tuesday, go to ER - no thanks don't need any more bills I drank 4 glasses of liquid to increase my hydration and stopped taking the second pill. now fluctuating between 120s to 150s. may have to take half of the other pill. appt on Thursday, we shall see, anyway just wanted to commiserate with you on how hard I know all this is for you. I am still taking my low dose aspirin am and pm; hang in there.
ReplyDeleteYou did the right thing by resigning. Sometimes you need to put yourself first and anyway why do anything for a trustee who is that insensitive?
ReplyDeleteI suspect the person who takes over your job will soon realize what an excellent job you've done.
ReplyDeleteOh Joanne, I know how frustrated you are. My husband has worked with TBI and stroke patients his entire career. My oldest daughter also had a TBI when nineteen and her life has been forever altered. And, it does take time. Two years is usually the norm. What strength you have. Rest, tend your garden and do what you enjoy most. You don't need aggravation. They'll get the blood pressure down. It took four different meds till they got mine down.
ReplyDeletejust what is the matter with some people. I find myself asking that question a lot lately. it seems so many in this nation have forgotten compassion and civility. screw that troublesome trustee. let her/him deal with the mistakes and do your job as well. I'm sure they will soon come to understand 'be careful what you wish for'. concentrate on yourself and recovering. and no, not boring, never boring. I too wish I lived closer.
ReplyDeletexox
ReplyDeleteI think it was wise for you to resign. Just rest, recuperate, and get well. Keep it up. We are all rooting for you. Aloha from Hawaii.
ReplyDeleteGood to hear you resigned, but I think it's horrible the way you were goaded into it. What toxic place!
ReplyDeleteTraumatic head injury causes you to lose your sense of humor. My injury was minor compared to yours and it was months before I could laugh or crack a joke. I felt stupid because I couldn't concentrate on reading as much as a paragraph of a book or news article. I will tell you that all these things come back in time but that really doesn't make you feel better now. As far as you being boring that has not happened at all. Sharing your story has been enlightening. Perhaps it will help someone else who is dealing with similar issues. Keep plodding on and you will become more normal each day.
ReplyDeleteOur grandson is in Paramedic school now; has been telling us stories about trying to find veins. Sounds like you have provided lots of practice for students like him. Not a happy event for you, though. You said in a previous post that the job paid yours and Laura's bills. Maybe we need to do a GOFUNDME page for you. That might offer a little pang of remorse for your "trustee" who has no sympathy. Seeing that many people do care! We appreciate you and how you are making it. You are an inspiration and a great leader in our common fight for humanity. I hope the blood pressure issue is resolved.
ReplyDeleteIt is so difficult to know what to say. I'm horrified by the manner in which this happened. I'm shocked by all your accident caused. I am hoping you get a huge settlement from the bus company. You certainly deserve it. Keep on taking care of yourself and getting better every day.
ReplyDeleteThere have been a lot of changes and improvements in BP meds in the last few years, most with fewer side effects. I do suggest a consult with a cardio guy, calcium channel blockers work pretty well without a lot of side effects.
ReplyDeleteTake care, thinking of you.
All the best,
Mike
You just tell me the name of the person who criticized you and I'll put on my crown and go after that person the same way I attack the nine-year-old boys who live behind me.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Janie
They`ll miss you....and you`ll miss them, but you did the right thing in putting in your reignation.
ReplyDeleteBlood pressure is a funny thing...my mother has always shown high readings...a doctor new to her panicked and prescribed something to lower it with the result that she kept fainting. High for most people is her normal, it seems.
Look after yourself.
All best wishes to you. You are resilient and remarkable. And do stay in contact with a cardiologist, as Mike ("Should Fish More") suggests above my comment. I had my life saved by one of his profession 11 years ago and still see him every 6 months.
ReplyDeleteI read still.
ReplyDeleteI hope your self amusement comes back. I recently read how important that was for Michael Fox dealing with his condition. Wishing you the best.
ReplyDeleteI'm thrilled to hear you resigned that very day. We are too old to take any sh*t from anyone. What a bunch of insensitive idiots.
ReplyDeleteThe accident may have been a blessing in disguise! Hang in there. You are tough!! I'll say some prayers!
ReplyDelete